The Whomp Origin Story
Thrope the Curator was in a bit of a pickle. He wanted to send out a greeting card to Shithead, His intention being to make it clear to Shithead that they were indeed a Shithead. No problem, he thought, the internet will give me what I want. But Thrope couldn’t find a card for Shithead because everything he saw was trying to be funny; but he wasn't trying to make Shithead laugh. In desperation Thrope himself made exactly the sort of card he wanted, and sent it to Shithead. Shithead got the message. A happy ending!
Thrope the Curator then had an idea. You could say (if you wanted to make a really weak joke) that it hit him with a whomp! He personally knew a brace of Bastards, a trio of Twats, a considerable collection of Cunts, and a myriad Motherfuckers. He realised that you probably do too, and that he’d be doing you a great service by providing the cards you want. You'll find them in his 'I Hate You' section.
The rest was/will be/might have been history. Thrope had such fun watching his sweatshop orphans labouring over piles of cards that he asked them to make others with pictures on, that his friends could even send to people that they, you know, liked.
Welcome to Whomp!
Cards on the table...
Whomp is run by a solitary, and occasionally quite grumpy and irritable, human man-person. So when they say 'we', he means 'I'. See how confusing it could all get? We'll just run with 'we' and 'our'. So that's the way it is!
P.S. Thrope says, "please buy cards".
Whomp's address is:
John Buddle Work Village, Buddle Road, Newcastle upon Tyne NE4 8AW.